You continue to be one of my favorite writers on Substack. Such a pleasure to read. It doesn’t hurt that we are close to the same age and both know from experience about Wolfman Jack, transistor radios, and falling in love again in our late fifties.
As I was reading, I thought, "I love that, I'm going to restack it." But as I kept going I realized that the problem with your writing is that you have so damned many quotable sections :-). Truly great piece. I remember back in high school finding out a girl I liked wrote poetry. I said, "oh - what are your poems about." She said, "love and death of course". I never forgot that.
I have to think about these questions of yours. Maybe in some ways I’ve gone, deeper, quieter with my affinities. And that quietness, being able to receive and be grateful for this life is a great gift. I get it, that tenderness in not knowing how long Bruce and I will be given. So much wisdom here and great writing.
Forgive me, but one more word, if I might. Part of my impetus for the piece was the sense that writers as a breed are all too reluctant and cynical to talk about love and its primary role in our lives. I wanted to address that lack, and, in a kind of rebellion, simply articulate the handful of things that matter to me. All of my best experiences of literature are of a writer relating that feeling of love, whether it is of Huck and Jim on the river, or Melville's endless paens to the beauty of the ocean.
Love this comment. I agree about the cynicism in writers to not talk about love. I remember my MFA training where we had to be ironic and understated. That training might have taught me how to write an English sentence but it screwed me up when my "big break" came in the early 2000's. A wise and wonderful editor said it's okay to offer high emotion, to be sentimental, so I broke out of that and put emotion on the page. (Agents and editors consistently commented on that understated bit and how it didn't allow the writing to come through.) I loved this piece. But I've had my adventures and good ones at that. This quiet and contentment is its own adventure though. I don't know if that makes sense...
Well, that’s an exaggeration. I learned a lot of really good things there too. In my late forties, I got a scholarship and teaching fellowship to a school on the east coast, through the efforts of a very kind and well known writer, and I was a small part of that larger community for many years. Despite that, I eventually faded away because it was the only way to isolate my own feelings, and tune in to those exclusively, which is tricky to do even here on Substack
I hear you on learning really good things too. What school out east? Yes I'm nosy. I got my MFA from the University of Arkansas, Fayetteville. Many good things came out of that program for me, including finding out I had "charm" which stood me in very good stead for my publicity job. Very cool you got to be part of that larger community for many years. Not sure I follow your last sentence "It was the only way to isolate your own feelings and tune into those exclusively, which is tricky to do here on Substack." Are you going to publish your memoir as a book someday?
I retired after 25 years as a union carpenter, and now I work doing arts and crafts with the disabled. Everything I’ve read by you has the ring of truth, and brings me right back on the job site. And now this essay!🫡
I so enjoy and identify with your writing! Thank you! From New Zealand🇳🇿
Thank you so much!
You continue to be one of my favorite writers on Substack. Such a pleasure to read. It doesn’t hurt that we are close to the same age and both know from experience about Wolfman Jack, transistor radios, and falling in love again in our late fifties.
Thank you! Yeah, I wondered who was gonna get the Wolfman Jack reference.
Thank you very much, @Librarian of Celaeno
What a wonderful read to start the morning, time to wake up the kids
Thank you!
"Perhaps, what we don't see with affection, we hardly see at all".... I like that, a lot...
This piece is a special one.
Thank you!
As I was reading, I thought, "I love that, I'm going to restack it." But as I kept going I realized that the problem with your writing is that you have so damned many quotable sections :-). Truly great piece. I remember back in high school finding out a girl I liked wrote poetry. I said, "oh - what are your poems about." She said, "love and death of course". I never forgot that.
Thank you so much! I can’t imagine writing it ten years ago, but I guess these subjects steal up on you. Thanks again!
Transcendent piece of writing. Thank you for this. I will give this a few more reads.
Thank you!
I have to think about these questions of yours. Maybe in some ways I’ve gone, deeper, quieter with my affinities. And that quietness, being able to receive and be grateful for this life is a great gift. I get it, that tenderness in not knowing how long Bruce and I will be given. So much wisdom here and great writing.
Forgive me, but one more word, if I might. Part of my impetus for the piece was the sense that writers as a breed are all too reluctant and cynical to talk about love and its primary role in our lives. I wanted to address that lack, and, in a kind of rebellion, simply articulate the handful of things that matter to me. All of my best experiences of literature are of a writer relating that feeling of love, whether it is of Huck and Jim on the river, or Melville's endless paens to the beauty of the ocean.
Love this comment. I agree about the cynicism in writers to not talk about love. I remember my MFA training where we had to be ironic and understated. That training might have taught me how to write an English sentence but it screwed me up when my "big break" came in the early 2000's. A wise and wonderful editor said it's okay to offer high emotion, to be sentimental, so I broke out of that and put emotion on the page. (Agents and editors consistently commented on that understated bit and how it didn't allow the writing to come through.) I loved this piece. But I've had my adventures and good ones at that. This quiet and contentment is its own adventure though. I don't know if that makes sense...
Thank you for responding. I was in a program too, and “sentimentality” was the bugbear. So much so that it perverted one’s sense of reality.
Can you say more how it perverted your sense of reality? What kind of program?
Well, that’s an exaggeration. I learned a lot of really good things there too. In my late forties, I got a scholarship and teaching fellowship to a school on the east coast, through the efforts of a very kind and well known writer, and I was a small part of that larger community for many years. Despite that, I eventually faded away because it was the only way to isolate my own feelings, and tune in to those exclusively, which is tricky to do even here on Substack
I hear you on learning really good things too. What school out east? Yes I'm nosy. I got my MFA from the University of Arkansas, Fayetteville. Many good things came out of that program for me, including finding out I had "charm" which stood me in very good stead for my publicity job. Very cool you got to be part of that larger community for many years. Not sure I follow your last sentence "It was the only way to isolate your own feelings and tune into those exclusively, which is tricky to do here on Substack." Are you going to publish your memoir as a book someday?
Thank you, Katie! I wondered how you might think about this piece, but thank you very much for reading!
I knew I liked you as soon as I saw those books!
I retired after 25 years as a union carpenter, and now I work doing arts and crafts with the disabled. Everything I’ve read by you has the ring of truth, and brings me right back on the job site. And now this essay!🫡
I love all of it!
Thank you so much! Figuring out what you want to do after retirement is hard for some, but it sounds like you have it wired. Thanks again!
A very minor example of a love found later in life...
https://tonymartyr.substack.com/p/windfall
I'm going to read this again, and be back to talk about it. For now? I wish I could write like this
Thank you very much!
Such a gift. Thank you again.
Very wise words from you, sir. I sent it to my Father to read
Thank you very much!
Touching. You succeeded in moving my emotions. Kind of embarrassing here on the jobsite. Thanks. Take care.
Beautiful. As I always suspected, you are among many other achievements, a philosopher as well as a craftsman!